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  |  | #9511 |   | Government [is] an illusion the governed should not encourage. 		-- John Updike, "Couples"
  |    |  | #9512 |   | Government lies, and newspapers lie, but in a democracy they are different lies.
  |    |  | #9513 |   | Government spending?  I don't know what it's all about.  I don't know any more about this thing than an economist does, and, God knows, he doesn't know much. 		-- Will Rogers
  |    |  | #9514 |   | 	Graduating seniors, parents and friends... 	Let me begin by reassuring you that my remarks today will stand up to the most stringent requirements of the new appropriateness. 	The intra-college sensitivity advisory committee has vetted the text of even trace amounts of subconscious racism, sexism and classism. 	Moreover, a faculty panel of deconstructionists have reconfigured the rhetorical components within a post-structuralist framework, so as to expunge any offensive elements of western rationalism and linear logic. 	Finally, all references flowing from a white, male, eurocentric perspective have been eliminated, as have any other ruminations deemed denigrating to the political consensus of the moment.
  	Thank you and good luck. 		-- Doonesbury, the University Chancellor's graduation speech.
  |    |  | #9515 |   | Great Moments in History: #3
  August 27, 1949: 	A Hall of Fame opened to honor outstanding members of the 	Women's Air Corp.  It was a WAC's Museum.
  |    |  | #9516 |   | 	Grover Cleveland, though constantly at loggerheads with the Senate, got on better with the House of Representatives.  A popular story circulating during his presidency concerned the night he was roused by his wife crying, "Wake up!  I think there are burglars in the house." 	"No, no, my dear," said the president sleepily, "in the Senate maybe, but not in the House."
  |    |  | #9517 |   | Grub first, then ethics. 		-- Bertolt Brecht
  |    |  | #9518 |   | Hark ye, Clinker, you are a most notorious offender.  You stand convicted of sickness, hunger, wretchedness, and want. 		-- Tobias Smollet
  |    |  | #9519 |   | Has the great art and mystery of politics no apparent utility? Does it appear to be unqualifiedly ratty, raffish, sordid, obscene and low down, and its salient virtuosi a gang of umitigated scoundrels?  Then let us not forget its high capacity to soothe and tickel the midriff, its incomparable services as a maker of entertainment. 		-- H.L. Mencken, "A Carnival of Buncombe"
  |    |  | #9520 |   | Have you noticed the way people's intelligence capabilities decline sharply the minute they start waving guns around? 		-- Dr. Who
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