 |
| #3096 | | "The only way I can lose this election is if I'm caught in bed with a dead
girl or a live boy."
-- Louisiana governor Edwin Edwards
|
|
| #3097 | | David Letterman's "Things we can be proud of as Americans":
* Greatest number of citizens who have actually boarded a UFO
* Many newspapers feature "JUMBLE"
* Hourly motel rates
* Vast majority of Elvis movies made here
* Didn't just give up right away during World War II like some
countries we could mention
* Goatees & Van Dykes thought to be worn only by weenies
* Our well-behaved golf professionals
* Fabulous babes coast to coast
|
|
| #3098 | | "Danger, you haven't seen the last of me!"
"No, but the first of you turns my stomach!"
-- The Firesign Theatre's Nick Danger
|
|
| #3099 | | Pray to God, but keep rowing to shore.
-- Russian Proverb
|
|
| #3100 | | "Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good,
you'll have to ram them down people's throats."
-- Howard Aiken
|
|
| #3101 | | "When anyone says `theoretically,' they really mean `not really.'"
-- David Parnas
|
|
| #3102 | | "No problem is so formidable that you can't walk away from it."
-- C. Schulz
|
|
| #3103 | | "The good Christian should beware of mathematicians and all those who make
empty prophecies. The danger already exists that mathematicians have made
a covenant with the devil to darken the spirit and confine man in the
bonds of Hell."
-- Saint Augustine
|
|
| #3104 | | "For the man who has everything... Penicillin."
-- F. Borquin
|
|
| #3105 | | "I've finally learned what `upward compatible' means. It means we
get to keep all our old mistakes."
-- Dennie van Tassel
|
|
|
| ... ... |
